Gut Rumbles
 

October 13, 2003

trust me

As a genuine pervert and a person who enjoys adventurous sex, I don't want to hear any more "uuugggghhhs!" about mentholated cough drops. If you've never tried them, you're missing the Midnight Train. Let me tell you how this works.

For MEN: Put a Hall's Cough Drop in your mouth and work it around really good until you feel mentholated coldness on your tongue when you draw in a breath. Then, go down on your woman. Keep the cough drop in your mouth, but use a lot of breath and tongue as your mentholated saliva annoints her nether regions. She'll curl her toes and cum like a mink in heat.

For WIMMEN: Put a Hall's Cough Drop in your mouth, work it around really good, then go down on your man with the cough drop tucked away in your cheek. Be sure to use lots of breath. That REALLY accentuates the menthol. When you see his toes curl and he starts to scream for Bejus, you can either quit or get ready to swallow. That's up to you.

That is an Acidman Handy Hint For Mentholated Sex. If you've never tried a Hall's Job, you should. If you think the entire idea of mentholated oral sex is disgusting, what the hell are you doing reading this blog? I'm giving good advice here.

I don't claim to be rated "G."

Comments

Altoids (original) work better. A hot ball works too, if you're into that sort of shit.

Posted by: SageOne on October 13, 2003 06:37 PM

Altoids. Yep. I've never had hair ripped out of my head until I went down on the g/f with an Altoid in my mouth. She came for about five minutes in a row.

Posted by: Raging Dave on October 13, 2003 07:02 PM

*adding Halls to the grocery list*

Posted by: shell on October 13, 2003 07:07 PM

Same principle as the Ice Blow Job. Makes lotsa sense. Will try.

Posted by: dragonfly jenny on October 13, 2003 07:11 PM

A gotta go with A-Man here. The Altoid routine is different than the Menthol routine. They're both great, but the Hall's lasts longer. I like the ice, too, but it tends to numb a person. I've tried these on myself so I know whereof I speak.

Posted by: Velociman on October 13, 2003 08:25 PM

Plus, it clears your sinuses. It's win/win.

Posted by: GORDON on October 13, 2003 08:56 PM

Oh! Well, I never saw THAT in Cosmo! LOL!!

Posted by: Joan of Argghh! on October 13, 2003 09:12 PM

And all this time, I thought I was the ONLY one who knew that secret....

Posted by: Greg on October 13, 2003 10:48 PM

Damn, I have got to try all of these soon...my husband will wonder where the hell I got the ideas... ; )~

Posted by: Janet on October 14, 2003 12:17 AM

Velociman, did you say what I thought you said?? "I've tried these on myself.."

Posted by: Larry on October 14, 2003 08:36 AM

Ah so, Mentholman.

Posted by: Ron on October 14, 2003 09:56 AM

Okay, who's the SOB who let the secret get out?

Damn, and I thought that was so obscure no-one would ever publish it.

Halls work the best, by the by. Delightful way to fight off the possibility of a cold in those winter months.

Posted by: Mr. Lion on October 14, 2003 06:06 PM

Ah, brings back happy memories of a very decadent trip to Chicago, enjoyed the Halls, ice cubes...... the full treatment. I will vouch for their effectiveness from the female POV ;)

Posted by: Kat on October 14, 2003 06:33 PM

If you're not into the cough drop thing, there's many different flavoured gels you can get at your local sex shop that do the same thing. I picked up some mango peach, cinnamon and cherry the other night. YUMMY! Massage it on, a little hot breath and kapow!

Posted by: Lisa on October 14, 2003 08:54 PM

Frozen coconut fruit pops. Just the right shape, just the right length, cold as hell, and tastes good too. Chills things down so he can warm them up to boiling again!

Of course, if you don't like the pricey fruit bars, a generic popsicle will do just as well. Just don't buy the twinpops. Not as good. Just too big. sometimes smaller is better.

Posted by: Mamamontezz on October 14, 2003 11:18 PM

Well, damn.

My husband sends me an email link to this entry with the message "Does this work?"

Crap. You're keeping me busy, Rob. And we're busy enough already! Sheesh... :)

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