October 03, 2003

a perpetual motion machine

I know that any rational person is going to find this statement difficult to believe, but you really need to trust me here. I was fooling around on the computer table with some duct tape, a box of kitchen matches, an old 8-track tape that fell out of its windings and a super-lubricated, ribbed condom. I was kinda moving all the parts around and playing with them like a jigsaw puzzle and the next thing I know, I've created a Perpetual Motion Machine.

Yeah, I am aware that the concept is impossible, but I believe that my invention may change every false idea we ever had about energy. I hope that my invention perhaps will possibly keep working until tomorrow morning, when I can declare a need for more research money, because maybe this thing could revolutionize physics, but it probably won't because I made the whole thing up.

Still, I believe the possibility that my lie could bring me a very fat research grant and the praises of trolls on my blog might make sending me a couple of fat grant packages not impossible to resist. I think that I might be on the right track here. I am not uncertain about it.

I just need more money to be sure. I LOVE "science" today.