Gut Rumbles
 

September 19, 2003

well, duh!

After I threatened to shoot a troll who assumed my identity and ran around leaving shitty comments on various blogs, the bastard reported me to Alltel and my ISP dropped me like a hot rock on July 3rd.

What they DID NOT do was stop billing me for the internet service that THEY cut off. I quit paying the internet charges and paid only the phone bill. I received a nastygram a few days ago saying that I owed Alltel money for the internet account that THEY cancelled, that I've been billed for since it was cancelled and I better put up, or lose my phone service AND my good credit.

I called Alltel. I spoke to a very polite drone who told me that HE could not handle my problem because "security" had cancelled my account. I told him that nobody owed me any money. I paid the phone bill. I just wanted the internet charges dropped from my account because I didn't have internet services through his company anymore. Oh, by the way, YOU FUCKERS DID THAT!!! HOW DARE YOU continue to charge me for something YOU took away and then threaten me because I'm not paying for it?

He said that security only could handle my problem. So, I called Security. Nobody answered the phone.

I got an answering machine, eventually, and I left a message: "My name is Robert Smith. You shits cut off my internet service on July third. I keep getting charged for internet service that YOU cut off. I talked to some witless wonder in your main office who told me that only YOU, who cut my service could stop the bogus bills from appearing on my account. Of course YOU are too busy to answer the fucking phone, just as you were too busy to notify whomever you should have that I NO LONGER HAVE AN ACCOUNT WITH YOU since July third. If I did MY job the way you do YOURS, my boss would run ME the down the road tomorrow. Take the charges off my bill NOW, because I don't owe you any money. Thank you, fuck you, and don't send me another goddam bill."

I like cussing into answering machines. I would have much rather cussed an actual human being from "Security," but I'll settle for what I can get.

How ridiculous is this anyway? THEY cut me off, then get THEY all snooty when I don't pay them for something I don't have anymore.

Yeah. Go buy Alltel stock tomorrow. That place is manned by winos.

Comments

Mr. Helpful has a link to a site that is all about stuff like this. I read on there about Direct TV insisting that a dead man pay off the rest of his year long contract even though he died about 6 months into it. They went after his estate and everything. I can't remember the name of the site, but I'll go get it....

Posted by: Stevie on September 20, 2003 02:15 AM

I remember now...Planet Feedback.

Posted by: Stevie on September 20, 2003 02:16 AM

I also have Alltel and they are complete morons on every single level.

There is no such thing as competent customer service anymore.

Posted by: Dawn on September 20, 2003 09:50 AM

Not that this is to the scale of your saga, but I lived in a town once where I had to pay .53 a month NOT to have long distance service. Go figure.

Posted by: MaryAnn on September 20, 2003 10:03 AM

Mr. Lion's rule of doing business with morons: Open accounts with pre-paid credit cards, available at any western union location. Then, when (not if) they decide to fuck you, you can explain to them which orifice they can jam it up, without risking your credit.

Bonus points if you don't use your real name.

Posted by: Mr. Lion on September 20, 2003 02:04 PM

Cool article!!!

Posted by: dzwonki polifoniczne on April 2, 2004 05:19 AM

Cool article!!!

Posted by: dzwonki polifoniczne on April 13, 2004 02:09 AM

Cool article!!!

Posted by: dzwonki polifoniczne on April 15, 2004 07:20 AM

Hmmmmm interesting !!!

Posted by: nieruchomo on May 23, 2004 02:20 PM

Cool Stuff !!!

Posted by: nokia on May 24, 2004 11:37 PM
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