Gut Rumbles
 

September 19, 2003

wow!

I have to admit that this woman lives an interesting life.

I just discovered that this guy likes peanut butter almost as much as I do. NOBODY likes peanut butter MORE than I do. I eat it with a spoon, right out of the jar. My favorite is Peter Pan Crunchy.

Goddam! Shit! Who the hell is this person to tell me not to cuss on my blog? Don't get me started on the alphabet. I've posted on that subject before. (Beavers can build a "dam" and that's okay. If I don't like the damned "dam," I am using foul language. The difference between a "witch" and a "bitch" is one letter. Gimme a break here. Take your underwear out of the crack of your fucking ass and loosen up for once in your Puritanical life, you up-tight... well, never mind. I don't write for my mama, but she loves me anyway. Even when I cuss.

AHA! I see that I have more diversity on my blog. ALL HAIL DIVERSITY! Welcome aboard, Tony.

Take a look at the picture. Be honest, dammit. this guy looks older than I do. Right? Please tell me I'm right, even if you have to lie to me. I DON'T LOOK 55 YEARS OLD!!! Honest. I really don't.

I really don't know what to make of this, but at least he's not a feces-flinging, nut-bowl-dweller. Keep leaning to starboard and you'll be all right in the end.

What is wrong with questioning society's uptight, bunched-underwear obsession with letter formation? Take the word "DUCK" for example. Change the first letter and you have a "foul" word. Change that first letter again and you've got wonderful wishes for a friend. Change it one more time and things beccome confusing.

Okay, let's make everything perfectly clear. FUCK is an awful, terrible, horrible word, isn't it? DUCK makes you think of cute little birds. SUCK is okay, as long as you are speaking of vacuum cleaners and medical devices. MUCK is something you don't want to walk in, because getting all that mud all over you just SUCKS. FUCK that!

Hey! BUCK season opens soon in Georgia! I hope my friends have some LUCK in the woods.

We have an obscene word that is one letter away from being a feathered creature, a furry mammal, good fortune, a vacuum cleaner and a muddy place to walk. Explain the logic of how ONE LETTER OF THE ALPAHABET makes a word go from "good" to "bad."

I don't fucking worry about such silly shit. I have more important things to occupy my time.


Comments

I love peanut butter! I love Peter Pan creamy. I can eat almost a whole jar in one sitting! I love peanut butter on almost anything. Including raw cabbage.

And no, you don't look 55. 50 maybe. You still look good enough to do several of those four letter words to.

Posted by: drc on September 19, 2003 09:28 PM

Have you ever seen the show Extreme Makeover???? Well the guy sure could use one while you sit back and eat a jar of peanut butter.

Posted by: becky on September 19, 2003 09:37 PM

Acidman, Why is IT that people are so offended by curse words.

It's words like War, Death, Disease and Famine that scare the shit out of me.

Posted by: Dawn on September 19, 2003 09:55 PM

The fact that you talk like "regular people" and don't try to sugarcoat a turd is the reason I come here. That and the fact that you are so damn funny.

These people who think they're being the "hall monitors" of the Internet to keep all the unruly kids in line think way too seriously about themselves.

Posted by: BJK on September 19, 2003 10:40 PM

Try riding a bunch of 10 and 11th graders aroung on a bus as the sub then you know true cussing this probalbly has nothing to do with the subject just my comment.

Posted by: gsprings on September 19, 2003 10:55 PM

Try riding a bunch of 10 and 11th graders aroung on a bus as the sub then you know true cussing this probalbly has nothing to do with the subject just my comment.

Posted by: gsprings on September 19, 2003 10:55 PM

Try riding a bunch of 10 and 11th graders aroung on a bus as the sub then you know true cussing this probalbly has nothing to do with the subject just my comment.

Posted by: gsprings on September 19, 2003 10:55 PM

I really can spell at 5 in the moring lol ga

Posted by: gsprings on September 19, 2003 10:58 PM

Ever have a Grilled Peanut Butter sandwich?

Just make a regular peanut butter sandwich. (I'm partial to Peter Pan Crunchy too.) Butter the outside on both sides. Then Lightly brown in a skillet. Best eaten warm.

MMM - good. I've been eating those since I was a little kid. Of course the're about 1000 calories per cubic centimeter, but who's counting.

Posted by: Roy on September 19, 2003 11:23 PM

You ABSOLUTELY DO NOT look as old as that guy.....I was so distracted by the idiotic way he is writing (pirate speak????) that I had to go back and take a second look . How come you didn't make fun of him for the pirate speak like you do when people write in baby talk? Anyway, to reiterate. You look fine my man. Your pic on your front page makes me want to sit on a deck on a beach somewhere with you and sip drinks with umbrellas in them.

Posted by: Gracie on September 19, 2003 11:26 PM

Just what we fucking need, fucking people like that with their fucking rules about fucking blogging.

That is actually one of the shittier lists of blogging rules I have run across. Acidman, you did one that was a hell of a lot better. Not so great I'm going to go look it up, but it was OK.

Posted by: Smartass on September 19, 2003 11:30 PM

Thanks, Acidman.

Posted by: Tony S. on September 20, 2003 09:23 AM

Hell Acidman, I'm 32 and I look older than you. If I sat and thought about that I might get depressed... I need another beer...

Posted by: Graumagus on September 20, 2003 11:09 AM

Y