July 11, 2003
english... what a language
REASONS WHY THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE IS HARD TO LEARN/WRITE
1) The bandage was wound around the wound.
2) The farm was used to produce produce.
3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4) We must polish the Polish furniture.
5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to
present the present.
8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10) I did not object to the object.
11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13) They were too close to the door to close it.
14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.
15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
18) After a number of injections my jaw got number.
19) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
20) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
21) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
Yup, it's no wonder people have so much trouble learning English. Just another good reason to be happy I was born here.
That was entertaining. I'd forgotten about all of those.
One of my favorites words:
"ghoti" -- which is prounounced "fish," as any fool can plainly see.
How so? Pronounce the "gh" like you pronounce it in "rough," the "o" like you pronounce it in "women," and the "ti" as you pronounce it in "frustration."
It was Bernard Shaw who first came up with that. Still always makes me laugh.
English is simple, really. Anytime you're confused, just look through the boughs at the rough trough of dough.
And just why is it we park on the driveway, and drive on the parkway?
Man, I found it enough of a challenge learning French, I'm sure glad I didn't have to learn English as a second language!